Role play as a couple: our advice

Whether it's because you're experiencing a rut in your relationship, or you're naturally drawn to this kind of play, chances are you've already thought about role play with your partner. But where do you start? How do you go about it? Here are our tips for introducing one or more role-play scenarios into your relationship with confidence.

Think about the scenario

Role play takes a little preparation. To start, talk to your partner about the scenarios that turn you both on. Use a night in together as a chance to list your desires and fantasies (a great way to start turning up the heat). If you’re feeling shy, you could create a shared Google Doc before talking it through together later (a more fun brainstorming session than the weekly office meeting, right?)

Set your boundaries

Once you've chosen your scenario, define together the activities you'd like to try, as well as those that don't appeal to you. If this exercise feels a bit tedious, feel free to look up sexual practice checklists online — you'll just need to fill one in together!

Choose a safeword

Using a safeword is essential in this kind of play. The idea is to choose a word that is completely out of context, and therefore easy to identify ("tabbouleh", "maggot", "pikachu" — we trust you to find the quirky little word that suits you best). Once spoken, this word will mean that you or your partner want to stop the game immediately: like a get-out card to use if you feel uncomfortable with the situation.

Write a script

It may seem a little formal, but writing a script also helps to frame the play and make sure everyone gets what they want out of it. It can also help each person get into character more easily. If you're feeling inspired, you can write it together from scratch. If not, draw on your list of limits and desires, and on outside sources of inspiration that might spark ideas: a TV series, a film, video games… anything goes. ;)

Set the mood

Whether you’re at home or somewhere set aside for the occasion, why not put together a little playlist (it can’t hurt), and gather a few accessories, decorations and outfits too? They’ll help you get more immersed in the game and make the experience even more special!

Don't forget the aftercare

Once the game is over, it's time to come back down to earth. And for that, nothing beats a little aftercare session! Cuddles, a nice bath or shower, a drink, some snacks — little things to help you reconnect with reality and take care of each other. During this moment together, feel free to talk about what just happened, what you enjoyed, the moments where you'd have liked to go further, and so on.

And now, over to you... 😉