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Playing as a couple allows you to vary pleasures, try new things, or (re)discover certain sensations. Anal stimulation is part of this range of options available to us and our partner. And contrary to popular belief, it can provide very intense orgasms. But before getting started, you should know that anal intercourse requires preparation. Here are some tips to help you get started with peace of mind!

Talk about your desires and fears

With the sexual liberation of recent decades, it's easier to talk about what we try under the sheets. Bye-bye to taboos that are slowly fading away. People are opening up, and many are speaking on the subject.

As a result, since we know what's happening with the neighbor, we compare our sexuality with that of others. We might even try experiences that don't particularly attract us just to feel normal.

It's worth repeating, everything is a matter of desire and consent! Just because many people around you practice anal sex doesn't mean you have to try it if you don't want to.

One of the reasons we hesitate to start, aside from not being attracted to it at all, are the fears we may have. So don't hesitate to talk with your partner, there's nothing better to build confidence!

Prepare your body but also your mind!

Let's review the most common anxieties and misconceptions when it comes to anal intercourse:

• “There will definitely be traces and that blocks me”

Your rectum is designed to eliminate what your body doesn't need. So there is indeed a possibility that you might find residues on your partner's genitals, finger, or on the sheets... And rest assured, it's not the end of the world! A shower, a good wash, and no one will notice! Don't be embarrassed, your partner knows very well what to expect if they venture to that level. But if the idea mortifies you, you always have the option of an anal douche. 

How does it work? It's very simple, grab your enema bulb on the fly, fill it with lukewarm water, then head to the shower:

• Gently insert the nozzle into your anus after applying some lubricant. If it gets stuck, don't force it, you might hurt yourself. Try again later, you are probably not ready yet psychologically!
• Press to pour the contents into your rectum. Apply continuous pressure, not like you're playing with a stress ball, you might suck secretions into the bulb and leave bacteria that you might reintroduce into your anus next time, and hello infections!
• Contract to hold the water, wait a few minutes, and head to the toilet to expel. Enjoy a clean rectum without residue for worry-free play!

Important notes, never use anything other than water in your enema bulb. No soap, product, or plant extract, as it will destroy your intestinal flora.

Also, do not perform enemas 5 times a week. If you practice enemas repeatedly, even using only water, your intestinal flora will take a hit, and you might lose the defecation reflex.

• “I will definitely be in pain”

If you prepare properly, are comfortable with the idea of trying, and trust your partner, there is no reason to suffer. And a little bonus tip, it's easier for a first attempt to try right after an orgasm! You'll be relaxed, thanks to dopamine, also known as the pleasure hormone, and it will be much easier and more enjoyable for you.

Your partner can start with finger caresses to familiarize you with the sensations around the anus. They can also practice anilingus if you are comfortable with the idea. The action of the tongue can help the sphincters relax!

If you need a helping hand to relax, opt for an anal relaxant that will guarantee a slight anesthetic effect and allow you to move on to the next steps more serenely. 

Are you handling it like a pro and the sensations are pretty cool? You can opt for an anal plug that will allow you to smoothly transition between the size of your partner's finger and their member. It is up to you to test penetration afterwards or not!

• “I'm afraid of getting stuck”

If the preparation stage (explained just above) is properly followed, there is really very, very little risk of this happening!

Stay in communication, at the slightest unpleasant sensation or slight pain, report it to your partner. Three options are available to you:

• Slow down the pace, a too-fast back-and-forth can be difficult to handle during a first try
• Change position, the angle of penetration may be putting too much pressure on your anal wall, opt for something that allows for more delicacy
• Stop the anal intercourse, with loud applause because you did it, it's a first and it’s respectable. You’ll have plenty of time to try the experience again later.

• “At least I'm sure I won't catch an STI”

Not at all! Sexually Transmitted Infections are not limited to vaginal penetrations. As soon as mucous membranes come into contact during unprotected intercourse, you are exposed to the risk of contracting an STI. In the case of anal intercourse, the mucous membrane of the glans comes into contact with the anal wall, so it is entirely possible for contamination to occur. Haven't been tested in a while? When in doubt, it's better to use a condom to play it safe!

• “Anal intercourse will drive him/her crazy, he/she will be out of control”

Everything is about communication! If you speak to each other frankly, there should be no problem on that side. The pace is too fast, you feel an unpleasant or painful sensation, or you just want to stop... Say it. Staying attentive while playing is possible! You just need to explain that you have some apprehensions and that you want to do it at your own pace and according to your rules.

A little reminder, in the heat of the moment, one might be tempted to switch from anal to vaginal intercourse. That's THE bad idea! The bacteria present in the anus can create a whole host of inconveniences if they come into contact with vaginal mucous membranes. You can opt for a shower before continuing or for a condom that you change before considering vaginal penetration.

On your way to new pleasures, with a relieved mind and many tips up your sleeve to prepare well. Remember, you should never feel obliged to do anything you don't want to! If you feel like it, go ahead and try; if not, there are plenty of alternatives for playing 😜