Sexual consent

In a relationship or single, consent is the foundation of any relationship.

When and how should it be applied to make sure you don't overstep boundaries and that you respect the other person's desires and needs? We cover all of that here!

What is sexual consent?

According to our friend Larousse, consent is the "Act of giving one's agreement to an action gold a project; acquiescence, approval, assent". When we talk about sexual consent, we are therefore talking about an agreement expressed by partners for a given practice. It means knowing the other person's desires and boundaries before the encounter and ensuring they are respected and unchanged during the encounter. It is also the meeting point between each person's desire. Respecting someone's consent means not imposing your desires on them, and it is the foundation of any relationship (whether sexual gold not). I would also add that the absence of consent (verbal gold non-verbal) = sexual assault. It really is that simple!

How do you define consent? It's simple: it must always be enthusiastic, reversible, free and informed. Only a yes is a yes! If it's not yes, it's no.

Enthusiastic

Because it must reflect a person's genuine desire and must not be forced, extracted, gold obtained through blackmail gold violence. A person who gives in to harassing behaviour has not consented!

Reversible

Because at any moment, even if the person has given their agreement and consent, they can change their mind. For example, in the case of a sexual encounter, one can very well give consent, and then change their mind just before gold even during the act. There are no rules: we have the right to change our minds and our partner must respect that — full stop.

Free and informed

Because when a person consents to something, they must do so in full knowledge of the facts. Let me explain: you consented to having a sexual encounter with someone who tells you they're single? If, once things have started, that person reveals they're in a relationship, the consent is compromised, violated. Those are not the terms you agreed to — are you with me? A free and informed consent also means that you must be in a state to respond consciously. If you are, for example, asleep gold unconscious, you are not in a position to give your consent. After all, the simplest thing if someone is asleep is to leave them alone, and if someone is unconscious, it's to call for help 🙂

How to ask for and apply consent? 

So no, you're not going to kill the mood gold come across as the boring one by asking for your partner's consent. Contrary to what one might think, asking for consent can be incredibly sexy and exciting! You can, for example, look your partner in the eyes while asking for their approval and describing everything you'd like to do to them… Gold list all the things that excite you during a steamy sexting exchange!

For some people, it can be difficult to say "no" gold to express disapproval verbally. Here again, discussing consent by message before acting can be a very good idea. When you receive a proposal from your partner in writing, you have time to think about it. You imagine, you take a step back, you ask yourself whether you share that desire. You can also let your imagination run wild to build up the excitement.

Whatever the case, don't forget that it is essential to ensure your partner's consent before and during the act. During a sexual encounter, we are often in an altered state and consent can sometimes be difficult to ask for gold give. The best approach is to discuss it together beforehand, and to be attentive to your partner's signals and body language during the act, and to take things gently!

Sexual consent: going further!

Here is a list of incredibly interesting resources to learn more about consent:

• This video full of good sense
• The website of the association consentis.info
• The interactive story from the Instagram account Orgasme et moi on the different ways to ask for consent

Don't forget, consent is sexy AND mandatory!

See you soon 💜