Life as a couple: does it kill love?

Have you ever faced those couples who claim to make love 3 times a day even though they have been together for many years. My dear Micheline, even if anything is possible, it is very rare to maintain the same relationship and the same sexual life when you have been in a couple for a long time. So there is no point in comparing yourself, you might end up losing feathers... But then, does living together kill love?

The hot/cold 😬

Life as a couple can be compared to a piece of profiteroles: at first, it's exciting, new, you get a full taste of this soft pastry and this hot (or very hot) chocolate sauce. But very quickly comes the coolness of the ice cream, like a sudden return to reality. This could symbolize the discovery of unknown facets (and sometimes a bit unpleasant, let's be honest) specific to our beloved. So, would life as a couple be the equivalent of that horrible hot-cold sensation on your teeth? Should we flee cohabitation at all costs to stay happy together?

That is not the solution. As with everything (it also works for profiteroles), you have to know how to find the balance. Here, it would be a balance between the closeness and the routine inherent in living together (and even in life in general ultimately) and "the little touch of piquancy" (with the Toulouse accent, it's important) that keeps a bit of sexiness in your couple's life.

The return of the flame 🔥

You might say: "Okay, that's nice, but how do I maintain this famous flame everyone talks about?" Well, believe it or not, it's not that complicated! If you feel that living with your partner has changed something in your relationship negatively (tensions, routine, or even loss of libido), know already that it is not necessarily due to your partner or your relationship in particular, and that this kind of thing happens in many couples. It is therefore likely that it will also happen with someone else. So wait a bit before throwing everything away, and ask yourself these few questions:

• Do I still love them?
• Is it our routine that I dislike, or just the concept of a too mundane routine that I refuse to have in my life?
• Have I experienced the same thing with my other partners? If it was already a subject of discord, did I communicate well with the other?

The balance 🧘

Identify the mistakes not to be repeated, and talk about it calmly to see if your partner feels the same way. Then, you should already see a bit clearer. The next step is to implement small actions to spice up this life together! We'll leave you with a few examples, here you go as a gift:

• plan a trip together, even for 1 or 2 days
• take time for solo moments, just for yourself, during which you do what YOU love
• plan an outing with your friends, without your partner (they can do the same on their side, so you'll have plenty to talk about)
• do a sports activity (without physical goals, just for the mind): in case of a decrease in libido, it can help you take control of your mind, channel your stress, and feel more in tune with your dear body
• bring out your toys, or treat yourself to a brand new one! It's always a good solution to discover new things together, laugh and (re)connect

In conclusion, life as a couple doesn't kill love but it can modify it. In any case, it's not necessarily a bad thing. Evolution is part of life, and therefore part of a couple's life which can go through different phases. By the way, if you want to know more on the subject, come check out our TikTok on " The 4 phases of a couple "!