What is edging?

The term comes from the word "edge", but it might not mean much to you yet. You may even have tried it without realising! So what is edging, how does it work and why give it a go? We explain everything here!

Edging is a sexual practice and a pleasurable way to play with frustration. It involves bringing yourself (or your partner) to the brink of orgasm, then letting the arousal subside. The idea isn’t to stop there, but to resume stimulation and make the eventual orgasm even more intense. Incredibly intense!

Is it only for people with a vulva?

Not at all! Whether you have a penis or a vulva, you can practise edging. The good news is that you can do it solo, as a couple, as a trio... the only limits are knowing your body and being able to hold back!

So how do you actually do it?

Solo

Set the scene: get comfortable, bring out your favourite toys if you use them, dim the lights, put some music on, light some incense... in short, create your favourite masturbation set-up.

Start touching yourself and let the pleasure build. When you feel an orgasm approaching, slow down or stop the stimulation for a few seconds (for example, if you’re using a sex toy, turn it down to its lowest setting; if you’re using your fingers, move more slowly). Try using your breath to channel that energy and let it flow! Breathing deeply can help you feel that sexual energy throughout your body and control your sensations.

When you feel your arousal has dropped by about half (the idea isn’t to lose it completely), build it up again, then stop once more, and so on. Repeat this little exercise until you can’t hold back your orgasm any longer. Then let go! Congratulations, you’ve just treated yourself to an out-of-this-world orgasm! 🚀

Before sharing this experience with anyone else, try it on your own to understand how your body works.

With a partner

First of all, talk about edging with your partner beforehand. You could agree on a word to say when you feel an orgasm approaching so they know to slow down. Over time, they probably won’t need that word, as they’ll get to know your responses and physical cues.

Start as you normally would and gradually turn up the heat.

When you feel your partner is about to orgasm, slow down. If you’re the one who wants to delay orgasm, use the word you agreed on with your partner, or simply ask them to slow down.

As with solo play, use your breathing to let your arousal subside, then continue with gentle stimulation to build your desire back up gradually.

Repeat these steps several times until you can’t hold back any longer!

Another option is to masturbate in front of your partner, so you can stay in control and go at your own pace.

4 good reasons to try edging 

• It helps you get to know your body, how it works and what you feel
• It makes orgasms more intense, increasing the release of feel-good hormones
• Practising edging with a partner can build sexual intimacy between you
• Edging is part of slow sex: a way to make sex last longer for even more pleasure

Now you’re ready to enjoy some incredible orgasms. Good luck on your quest!