When you’re in a relationship, you can sometimes get on each other’s nerves (especially if you live together). Being in each other’s space, misunderstandings, frustrations, one dirty sock too many and BOOM — an argument breaks out! Easy there, lovely: it’s normal to argue with the people you love. Here’s how to ease the tension and stop it happening too often. 🙂
Understand where it’s coming from
The clump of hair left in the bath might set things off, but it’s often just a symptom of a deeper problem. Mental load, inequality in the relationship, stress… We’ll leave you both to do a little soul-searching and work out what’s really behind the spat.
Talk to each other, calmly
Once you have a better idea of what’s bothering you about the other person, the key is to bring it up in the right way. Make time to talk together, perhaps over a glass of wine to help you unclench, and try to explain what’s wrong constructively, without taking digs at each other. A little tip: use a talking stick (or a talking breadstick if you’re at a restaurant) so you each get a chance to speak and be heard.
Let things settle
Once you’ve both explained yourselves and cleared the air, give yourselves time to process things and work together to resolve the problem. With the big conversation out of the way, you can have a few quick check-ins now and then to see whether things have improved. If it still feels tense, there’s probably more to talk about. If not, brilliant — NEXT!
Find your way back to each other ( but where are you? You’re not here! )
Remember what you love most about your partner and spend some quality time together to reconnect. A dinner date, a trip to the cinema, a naughty nap... It’s up to you. 😉
Lou ✨
Hi, I’m Lou! I have a degree in the humanities and social sciences, and I’ve been interested in all things sex-related for several years. After taking a number of courses, including one with sexologist Mathilde Magnien, I was asked by Passage du Désir to write articles for you about sex, love and relationships. My motto? Get people talking about sexual wellbeing in a light-hearted, fun and caring way. 💜
Lou ✨
Hi, I'm Lou! I have a degree in humanities and social sciences, and I've been interested in sexuality for several years. After completing several training courses, including one with sexologist Mathilde Magnien, Passage du Désir asked me to write articles for you about sexuality, love and relationships. My motto? Get people talking openly about sexual wellbeing, with a light-hearted, fun and supportive approach. 💜
