ANAL ORGASM: we tell you everything in 5 key points

Hello butterfly breakers 💜,

"Just to be clear though, anal hurts, right?"

Sales advisors and trainers at Passage du Désir hear this at least once a week.

So we thought it was time we talked about it.

In the collective imagination, anal penetration is associated with a painful experience, unlike vaginal penetration which is rarely linked to suffering by default. The real enemy? First-time stress, which tenses the périnée and kills desire.

5 keys to shed some light on the subject.

1. Anal penetration should NOT be painful

The perineum and perianal area are just as sensitive and erogenous as the genitals. A gentle massage (with a suitable oil) helps to, for example:

• Demystify penetration

• Relax the muscles

• Get familiar with the sensations

Quick tip: Take inspiration from the Sensate Focus method (thanks to Masters & Johnson), 5 steps to reconnect pleasure and touch.

2. Lubricate, lubricate, lubricate

Unlike the vagina, the anus is an area that does not self-lubricate, which is why we highly recommend using a long-lasting textured lube, paired for instance with a relaxing anal gel.

3. How to start gently?

For a successful first time:

• Choose a small plug (like the Hector, ideal for its tapered shape and soft material).

• Insert it yourself (or guide your partner(s)) to stay in control or reassure yourself.

• Breathe deeply to relax your muscles.

Never force (yourself): pleasure comes with patience

4. Stimulate related erogenous zones

Anal orgasm is often heightened by other caresses.

Winning combinations:

• Clitoris/penis + anal → Double stimulation for cascading orgasms.

• Breasts/perineum + anal → Activates more nerve endings.

⚡ Fun fact: Many people reach orgasm solely through anal stimulation, thanks to this neural connection!

5. Listen to your body and communicate

Pleasure is above all a matter of consent and kindness.

Our tips: 

• Take it step by step: No race for performance, please.

• Talk to your partner(s): Say what you like, what you want to try, what you feel step by step, and debrief after the experience.

• Stop at any moment: Any discomfort = pause or change of approach.

OUR ULTIMATE CHECKLIST

✔ Physical and mental preparation

✔ Quality lube

✔ Suitable equipment (plug, fingers...)

✔ Open communication with your partner

✔ Patience and self-kindness

As always, we share avenues for exploration that are never obligations. Prioritise your feelings and desires, explore them, and enjoy the moments you experience.